This is a link post, not another ‘Portlandia’ plug, honest!

Fred Armisen and Carrie Brownstein/Scott Green/IFC

What do you really want to know?  To be completely honest just for a second, we can’t tell you what you really want to know, except maybe by accident, and even then, you’ll just want to know something else, now won’t you?

So, instead of telling you what you really want to know, we have some amusing links. If you like us on Facebook (you should, you really should!), you may have seen many of these, just not quite this way.

“Portlandia”? Yeah, we are supposed to have a take on it, and maybe we do, but I forgot it while I was mixing my own special blend of chai to soothe my hens. So, in the meantime, here’s the New Yorker “profile” of the show that suggests maybe that Portland would be better off it were, I don’t know, Cincinnati? Then again, maybe it doesn’t suggest that at all? Any idea why we are ending all our sentences with question marks?

When it comes to Portlandia humor, our taste runs toward @AncientPortland, a Twitter-er-er with a taste for the absurd. Heck, not just a taste, the full three courses. Portland Monthly interviewed @AncientPortland and learned all sorts of amazing facts. A recent tweet:

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Ancient Portland

@Ancient Portland
In the 4th circle of Dante’s “Inferno Portlandese,” those guilty of greed spend eternity waiting in line in the rain at Pine State Biscuits.

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The Colorado Symphony is roughly the same size as the Oregon Symphony, and it has been struggling to make its mark in Denver’s sports-drenched culture. So, following the lead of several other smaller orchestras, it has decided to re-think itself, according to the Denver Post. I cringe a little when I see the word “relevancy,” when it comes to classical music programming, because it so often means the “Star Wars” score or something, but the general notion — to fight a guerilla war rather than hole up in the symphony hall fortress — has some merit. (Not that I have anything against “Star Wars,” Obi Wan…)

Sometimes Europe gets it, they really do! So, when economic times get tough, they fund the arts at higher levels. Of course, fighting the wisdom of Keynes by imposing government austerity measures during a severely recessed economy? That’s not so smart. But what do we know? We just write about the arts!

Need some background chatter about the arts as you prepare that hoppin’ john for New Year’s Eve? Well, we’ve got just the thing: The quick witted Karen Karbo talked to us about her new book, “How Georgia Became O’Keeffe” and we actually recorded it for you!

Here’s a shocker: If you teach a kid how to play an instrument in school (or how to draw, act, write creatively, etc.) she/he does better in other subjects! The whole “testing” culture of our schools prevents us from really educating our children. Isn’t it?

We started to take the 409 and a sponge to our own Leonardo, but we were brought up short by this article: Treat your Leonardo’s with more care!

We Love Open Culture. Which is where we found this video of John Cage’s appearance on “I’ve Got a Secret.” It’s wonderful in all sorts of ways.

 

The Merce Cunningham Dance Company becomes only historical on New Year’s Eve. Here’s Cunningham dancer Alma Guillermoprieto’s take on this historical event.

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